Wednesday, December 4, 2013

Top Ten Reasons Lacrosse SUCKS

Had enough of those arrogant Lacrosse players.  Here are ten reasons lacrosse sucks and is the stupidest sport in America  
10.  The Sport is whiter then snow.  1.9% of the players playing at Division one schools are minorities.  It is almost like non athletic whites found a loophole and a sport they can excel at, without having to worry about "brown" players showing them up.

9. Its not played in 75% of the country, high schools do not have this sport in most of the south and west.  Lacrosse is played in the pockets of upstate NY, Virginia, Maryland and some areas of California.

8.  You cannot see the stupid ball, try watching a game, you though trying to follow a hockey puck was hard.

7.  The players constant have their sticks with them, do football players wear their helmets, do basketball players dribble basketballs in the hall?

No.  6.  The Jerseys, they look like football jerseys, its like saying we are football players only with smaller penises.  I mean a psychiatrist could go on for years on the jerseys alone.

 5. The Rules, its like they just bastardized hockey rules.  In reality lacrosse is a glamorized game of air hockey played by a bunch of racist kids with small penises.

4.  The sport is most popular in America, where it is not popular.  Think of every other sport going, they are big in other parts of the world.  Water Polo is big in Hungary, cricket in India, soccer everywhere.  But no country even considers lacrosse a sport.  Think about that.  

3.  Yeardley Love, could you imagine if that happened in Alabama football.  But Virginia Lacrosse goes on like nothing happened.

2.  Attendance nobody goes.  Their major sport league cannot sell out 10,000 seat arenas, the people have spoken your sport sucks.
1.  Did I mention the small penises?

Why Aquinas Football wins and does it matter

Aquinas Football recently won the 2013 State Championship for the State of New York Class AA.  For this they should be congratulated.  But there are certain facts that must be presented:

 1) Upstate NY does not care about high school football

2) The quality of High School Football in upstate NY is among the lowest in the nation (Don't believe me, look at how many kids get scholarships compared to areas of similar populations).

Aquinas probably has the best coach in the country in Battaglia.  He won at Penfield, which is next to impossible.   Aquinas recruits, its fact they do.  So you are combining a private school that recruits and gives "academic" scholarships with the best coaching in the area of course they are going to win.  For what its worth the elite Triple AAA schools would probably stomp them.   So please, Aquinas is not a feel good story, it is a school that uses its advantages to win at football.  If the non football playing enrollment at Aquinas is not bothered by it, I see no reason for it to bother anyone else.  In conclusion, Aquinas winning in football is neither some great accomplishment to be admired or a reason to look down on the institution.  It is what it is an institution that has an advantage and takes advantage of it.